This month of February, the subject of love is a hot topic. Usually you hear about how to be a better spouse, how to have a better relationship, how to attract a significant other, and many other similar advice musings. There's so much celebration of our love for others. There's an entire holiday for it! But what about a different kind of love?
Loving yourself!
Do you ever have those days when loving yourself just doesn't come natural? Like. You wake up and from step one you just can't seem to get it right. Or you find that no matter how hard you try, you just can't get out of a funk and then you get to the point where you just stop trying to unfunkify your day? Or you have those days where you just feel like - how am I possibly worth anything? And you get to the point where you feel like you just don't matter. You see the value in everyone but yourself.
You know those days I'm talking about!
Can you tell I've had a lot of those kind of days in my life? I've learned on those days to cling to the truth of God's Word to hold and sustain me and carry me through those funks and into His beautiful love and reality of who I am!
But how can we love others when we don't first love ourselves?
I've heard that question more than once in my life, and it has stuck with me. On those days that I can't seem to accept the value in myself, I am reminded that I can't fully love those around me if I don't even love myself. I can't fully love God if I deny my own worth, His creation.
Now, I'm not saying that we have to be self-centered, prideful, conceited snobs. I'm saying let's accept ourselves for who we are. People who may not always get it right, but who can try anyway. People who see value in our own reflections, inside and out! God created us the way He wanted us, flaws (or, rather, perceived flaws) and all! So why do we so often sell ourselves short? Why do we deny God the chance to take pride in His creation?
Now, I'm not saying that we have to be self-centered, prideful, conceited snobs. I'm saying let's accept ourselves for who we are. People who may not always get it right, but who can try anyway. People who see value in our own reflections, inside and out! God created us the way He wanted us, flaws (or, rather, perceived flaws) and all! So why do we so often sell ourselves short? Why do we deny God the chance to take pride in His creation?
When you find yourself in the midst of "one of those day" I would encourage you to try one or all of the following 5 ideas and see what kind of difference it can make!!
>Look in the mirror and find at least one thing you can focus on to be positive about!
Many times it can be so easy to get sucked into the vortex of the new colony of zits that popped up overnight, hair that is less than cooperative, lovely bags under the eyes from life that just seems to be accelerating like crazy, and/or a few extra pounds that just won't disappear. Of course I never have to worry about any of those things. I mean, come on, perfect person typing here!!
In between all of the unflattering visions staring back from the mirror, there is still something there to appreciate. For me, it's my freckles or my eyes. Though most days I will say I need mascara because my eyelashes are so light that they seem to be non-existent otherwise. Or my foundation, which I use to conceal the lovely redness that lives on my face, covers up my freckles. But when I look in the mirror, before I've put any make-up on, I get a little smile seeing my freckles and my bare eyes.
What is that one physical quality you can choose to embrace about yourself? Maybe the uniqueness of your skin tone, your hair color, your feet? What can you look at to remind yourself of your beauty or handsomeness? You'll find that those less than perfect things that you can't seem to shake will begin to be less ugly in your mind.
>Thank God for another day!
It may be dreary weather, you may be fighting to get yourself out of bed, you may not have any excitement about what's ahead, but you are alive and breathing!!
You know what that means? That means God is still working in your life. That means God still has a purpose for you. That means His mercy and grace is new in your life for today! That means that you still have worth. That means whatever the day holds, no matter how happy or disappointing or difficult, God has given you His grace to go through another day. He is with you, and given you another breath of His life to sustain you.
And for all of that, we should daily thank Him! You'll be amazed at how your days will begin to be more bearable when, with your first breath, you thank God for another day and for His presence and provision.
>Remember that God, the Creator of the Universe, created you, uniquely and perfectly!
People can argue the origin of man all they want, but when it comes down to it, there a few undeniable facts about humans.
*Each human who has ever walked this earth has their own specific DNA that is uniquely their own.
*Each human who has ever walked this earth has their own specific fingerprints that are uniquely their own. And even more than that, each individual person's 10 fingers (or however many they have) has its own unique fingerprint.
*The inner workings of the human body are so amazingly, intricately interconnected. To me, that points to a designer. To others, that is nothing more than science.
Whichever side you stand on, you can still appreciate that you are unique. You are a masterpiece. The truth that I live by, the truth of the Bible, God's Word, tells me that God created me by hand. I have been created with a purpose, with worth.
When I look around and see the snow-capped mountains, or the most beautiful sunset over the plains of the Midwest, or the delicate flowers and trees, or the night sky full of stars, I can't help but be in awe of the Creator of these things. I can't help but be in awe over the fact that the same Creator of the beauty around me also created me! He created you!!
And He created you with a purpose and worth. When you allow yourself to accept and embrace that, you will begin to see your circumstances from the view of purpose and hope instead of despair.
>Stop letting other people's negativity affect you!
So many times we allow ourselves to buy into the negative, stupid, and often untruthful things people say about us. Why do we do that to ourselves? It's hard enough, at times, to speak and think about ourselves in a positive light without having to worry about what other people are saying.
There is no good that comes from surrounding yourself with people who cause you to feel lower about yourself. Whether it's a significant other, a good friend, a family member, or a coworker, if they seem to live to tear you down, maybe it is time to rethink your association with them. I realize you can't change some of those situations - you can't just say that Uncle Bob is no longer part of your family and Jill from work won't suddenly just stop existing. But maybe you can choose to interact with that person on a less frequent basis if possible. And if not, whenever anything negative is said, just go on and brush your shoulders off. And pray for grace to deal with that.
Either way, begin to find others who will truly build you up. Find people who are positive and encouraging. (K-Love radio, your catchy tag line has struck again!) Also, allow yourself to be reminded of the masterpiece that God created in you. For fear of sounding like a broken record, I'll simply refer you to the previous sections for more on this.
As you begin to weed out the negativity and replace that with positivity and truth about who you are, you will begin to see yourself through less jaded lenses.
>Do something to bless others!
Just like you should have people in your life who encourage and bless you, you should also be a blessing to others.
Maybe it's as simple as holding the door open for someone. Maybe it's sending a note to someone just to say hi. Maybe it's making a meal for someone in need, or buying someone's gas.
Whatever it is, when you do something to bless others, you will begin to feel better about yourself, leading to more self-love, leading to a better ability to love others!
So. DO you love yourself??
Loving others has to truly begin with loving yourself correctly. It's okay to love yourself. Loving yourself does not equate to pride or conceit. It is simply accepting your worth and not letting yourself believe the lies that you are less than amazing in your own right.
As Christ sings His love over you, go out and share that love with others!
