Yet I would say that there are times in life when we need to think inside the box.
WHAT?! But doesn't that go against what we know?
Yes. But isn't that sometimes the point?
Here's a little of my story:
A little over 2 years ago, I was told by my doctor that it would be very difficult for me to have children. To the point that she suggested using fertility drugs when Andy and I decided we were ready to start a family. I wasn't sold on the idea then, and there hasn't been a time in the past 2 years when I felt that was an option. As much as we have wanted children since day 1 of marriage, it just hasn't seemed like we were supposed to take that step. At least not yet.
Fast forward to right at 1 year after that, and God spoke very clearly to me through 3 different people that His promise for me was to have a child/children of my own. It was overwhelmingly joyful for me to hear that. With the prospect of difficulties, I was given a promise of health and healing for my body. Andy and I were given the promise of our own children.
For the past year, I have gone through feeling disappointed and like God had forgotten His promise to me. That God had forgotten me. Yet every time I began to allow myself to fall into that cycle of thinking, God proved His faithfulness in some area of my life. Whether it was a work of healing in my body, His awesome provision, or just experiencing the grace of His presence, He reminded me over and over that I have not once left His thoughts.
This summer, I again had the privilege of working at Royal Family KIDS Camp. One night, I stayed up talking to a good friend who also volunteers at camp. We were talking about the promises God has over our lives and how we are waiting to see what those promises fully hold for us. His was the promise of family, and though he had not yet been married or had children, he saw that promise being lived out through his life in a different way. Andy and I have the promise of children, and while we do not have children of our own, we also see that being lived out in other ways.
God showed me the illustration that our life is made up of boxes. As we move from one point in life to the next, He transitions us from one box to the next. His promise of family or children is not only for the future, but for the here and now as well. My friend was living in his "Family" box while being the father-figure to hurting children at RFKCamp, feeding into the lives of the boys he was mentoring at his church, and by being a brother and son to those around him. God's promise of him being a family man was being lived out in the box he was called to be in at that point in time. Now, God is in the process of transitioning him to his next "Family" box as he prepares to get married in just a few months, and become a step-father to his soon-to-be-wife's son. The label of family has manifested itself in my friend's life in different ways, but has always been true to the promise of God.
As I sit here, reflecting after yet another negative pregnancy test, I am not left feeling sad or disappointed. Rather I am left feeling hopeful. Hopeful because I know my journey is one of WHEN and not IF! Hopeful because God has not chosen now as the perfect time for us to receive the child or children He has prepared for us to take care of. Hopeful because while we do not yet have a child to call our own, we have a total of 8 wonderful, beautiful nieces, 1 awesome, handsome nephew, and 2 more nieces/nephews on the way. We have the children at church that God is allowing us to feed in to. We have the hurting kids at Royal Family KIDS who God has blessed us with reaching. God has promised us children of our own, promised us motherhood and fatherhood. Until our biological children come along, God has placed us in a position of influence in the lives of many children. My "Mommy" box will one day include giving birth and raising a child/children, but until then, I will live in the "Mommy" box God has placed me in for the time being.
I am choosing to live and daily think within the box God has called me to live in at the moment. What can I do to fulfill my duty as "Mother" as it applies to me today? How can I allow that to prepare me for my next box? He hasn't called any one of us to become something without first giving us the tools to do so. He is growing me through my experiences now so I can best fulfill my next stage of life.
What promises has God placed over your life? How can you live those out where you are now? Sometimes we think we know what God's intentions are, and we miss out on what He has for us today. We get so caught up in the disappointment that He has forgotten us that we fail to appreciate where He has called us to be for now. What does your box look like and what can you do to ensure that you think inside that box?
I found this button this week to remind me to always look at my life through the eyes of God's promises fulfilled. To remember that even if I don't see the end result of that promise, I can still live that out through the box I am in today!
